There are currently 10.4 flies in my house.
Yes. 10.4. One is dead on the floor and missing some body parts cuz it’s been stepped over a few times. #sorrynotsorry
But today I woke up and there was snow on the mountain tops. And the floor was cold on my feet. And I needed a jacket. And the flies were still there, but now their time is coming to a close.
This summer was awesome and hard and fulfilling and draining. And so hot.
If you think I’m grumpy when I’m tired and hungry, just toss “dying of heat exhaustion” into the mix and see how friendly I am.
We have no air conditioner so some days I would just take the kids and go for a drive to the store so we could get out of the 95 degree heat inside our house for just a few hours.
But then a week of cooler weather would come. And I’d be reminded of what it was like to not feel exhausted all the time. And to feel like you can cool down and not end the day drenched in sweat.
I think this is a parallel for my life right now. It’s awesome and hard and fulfilling and draining. And sometimes I feel like I’m too exhausted to function. I think any mom can relate to that.
But then I’ll get a break from our routine, a taste of calm and silence and rest. And it’s nice.
But I don’t want to enter into the next season of my life, see the snow on the mountain tops, feel the cold floor on my feet, and look back at the last season with regret. Because while a change in season may be a relief, there are always going to be challenges that accompany it.
Even though some flies may die {#flyswatterqueen}, new flies will always come.
I think the trick is to figure out how to live with the challenges, even thrive in spite of them, in the current season.
And I don’t think there is anything wrong with looking forward to new seasons. As long as you don’t try to live there too soon.
The baby phase of mothering is hard for me. My babies are not cuddly. They do not sleep well. They are incredibly fussy until they start to eat solids, crawl, and move on their own. It’s hard. And tiring. And limiting. But it’s also filled with the joy of “first’s” and growing and milestones. And every milestone means that we are closer to a content baby. Sometimes it’s hard not to look forward too much. Sometimes it’s hard to enjoy each day.
But every day I do my best. And that’s all any of us can do.
So, if you’re wishing all the flies were dead, just remember. The season will eventually pass. Don’t let the little tiny flies keep you from enjoying the one you’re in.
Heather says
I relate to so much of this; the flies, the babies who don’t sleep well, the exhaustion, the looking forward to new seasons but trying to remember to enjoy the one I’m in.